Telling your truth
Updated: Nov 24, 2022
It has been almost two weeks since my book has been out in the world. I had a launch party with some wonderful, supportive and loving people. I am taking each day as it comes and seeing all the goodness in this process. Because it truly has been wonderful to learn so much about myself and the people around me. I have heard reactions from some that this book touched them in ways I didn't even realize it would. Others have told me that certain stories reminded them too well of their college days. Some have begun to reflect on their own childhood and where they are today because of it. I have heard that my story has allowed people to ultimately think hard about their own relationships with alcohol, which is not something a lot of people are willing to do.
Ultimately, I'm grateful. It's incredible to watch people take my stories, relate them to their own lives and then learn from them. It shows a lot about a person. This memoir is my emotional truth. It is a compilation of vignettes that describe a journey of self-discovery over the course of my life. I wrote this book for the woman I was two years ago - the lost, scared, broken human being that was on the edge of shattering and for all the women just like her out there that are suffering in silence. I hope to continue to inspire people like that, just as I have done in these two short weeks.
So please keep sharing this book with your friends and loved ones. I hope to continue to reach and heal as many as I can for as long as I can.
Aside from the feedback I have received from personal friends, I also have been getting some great reviews. If you haven't yet - please review on Amazon. It helps me tremendously!!
This particular review really touched me, as I felt that she truly understand the story and message I was trying to convey. Please read and check out her blog and instagram. Thank you, MLM.
BOOK REVIEW: ON THE EDGE OF SHATTERED BY KIMBERLY KEARNS
"For all of my children. I can no longer hide and escape to the imaginary world at the bottom of a bottle. I can no longer wear a mask of my own. I can no longer keep these secrets."
This book hit home. Alcoholism, an addiction that runs deep in my family. One of the reasons I choose not to smoke or drink. I admired Kimberly Kearns’s courage to tell her truth.
The beginning takes us back a couple of years, and right then we can see the severity of her need for a drink. It’s so vivid, you feel as if you need to take a swig with her. This begins the journey to sobriety.
She takes us over the course of her lifetime, from childhood, teenage years, young adult, to adult. We got to see where the addiction started, how it progressed, and how it affected her everyday life.
"All of the morning of not being able to look in the mirror – I’m finally doing something about it. I’m not hiding anymore, and I’m dealing with the problem. I’m not finding comfort in a bottle of booze. Instead, I’m admitting the booze is the problem. I’m not drowning in my feelings in alcohol anymore. I’m finally dealing with it all."
We can see how her childhood played a part in her turning to depend on alcohol. For one, most of her adolescence, her mother always had a glass of wine in her hand sipping on it. The time of day did not matter. Her mom was also an alcoholic. Her father was hiding the fact that he was attracted to other men from her and her sisters for years. Her parents’ relationship was no where near picture perfect, and they argued a lot.
Kim began drinking in her teenage years, as most kids do. But she reveled in the feeling the alcohol gave her. She longed for it. She smoked cigarettes and weed at times. You see where she starts to contemplate why she’s doing all these things. Is it because of her parents, the excitement of rebelling, or was it for the simple joy it bought her in that moment?
Drinking did always give her a courage boost. There were time when Kim was placed in harms way because of the alcohol. Unfortunately, she learned at an early age how to hide and avoid the truth, even when it’s staring you right in the face. She never faced the negative impacts drinking had on her life. She buried those fears and truths in the furthest parts of her mind. She buried the trauma. Once Kim sobers up, she finally faces a lot of her early traumas. Being sober and forced to face difficult truths with a clear mind is a lot to bear. You no longer have a safety net to hide behind.
She realizes the pain her father must have felt when coming to terms with his sexuality and trying to hide who he was for so many years. Her mom’s loneliness and what led to her mom’s drinking.
Kim has had to deal with all the lies her parents told her, and realize she’s been lying to her kids the same. She has let her own shame keep her from seeing the truth just as her parents had. It’s a vicious cycle, but you can see she was determined to break it.
I admire her strength. She decided to start her recovery, and stuck to it. She did it for her husband, she did it for her kids, but most importantly, she did it for herself. Her husband and her friends gave her unwavering support. She put the alcohol down and she picked up her freedom.
"I decided to finally be seen. Face it all head-on and start feeling for the first time in a long time. From that day forward, there was no more hiding. That was the day I fully embraced vulnerability. I found the courage I needed to start living and feeling again. That was the day I quit drinking alcohol. That was the day I chose freedom."
On The Edge of Shattering is about self discovery, vulnerability, and facing truths. This was a fantastic read, and I highly recommend. And if you have anyone in your life facing addiction, think twice before judging them. You never know what skeletons lie in their closets, or the awful truths they are running away from.